Whartonite: “I need an interview so I’ve been booty calling the recruiter’s daughter for the past week.”

Sophomore girl: “I sometimes pee a little when I take my pants off.”

SDT sister: “They made me take off my third Hermès bracelet before skit round.”

Boy at Castle late night: “This is a serious international skank fest.”

Dirty freshman rush: “I didn’t have any toilet paper so I had to use my nametag.”