Trick–or–treat, lovelies! Actually, you don’t have to pick, because Highbrow has a real treat this ’Ween. We’re bringing you the most sticky, melt–in–your mouth, chocolatey, juicy gossip on the block. But you can’t trick Highbrow. We see through your sexy–kitty whiskers.
If she only had a brain. One drunk Dorothy–esque AXO found herself alone in a corn maze with only scarecrows for company. The frightened sister did what any self–sufficient college sophomore would do: she called her parents crying, telling them she was scared and needed them to pick her up. However, the sororo–crow forgot to mention to her parents that she was in corn maze. In New Jersey. Unfortunately, the corn–cerned parents drove all the way to her apartment at Penn. There’s no place like home.
It’s been way too long since our nocturnal friends have graced the Round Up. But no fear, the night is here. Last weekend at the OWLS funky sweater party, two Tridelts and one Theta tried to get a little funked–up. Although fall has only just begun, it seems as though the girls tried to create their own winter wonderland by bringing their own snow. The trio was caught white–handed in the bathroom, snorting cocaine. Luckily, they only have to pay $150 each to get the lines off their permanent records. What happens in Camden stays in Camden.
And another story about Oz and freshman girls. A small group of girls was hanging out in an Oz brother’s bedroom. After one too many glasses of spiked Manischewitz, a freshman girl shouted to the room, “Raise your hand if you’re Jewish!” After finding hers the only hand in the air, the girl alleviated her loneliness by hooking up with another freshman girl in the brother’s bed. The brothers looked on to the hook up fondly. Raise your hand if you think this is creepy.
Just because the Mask and Wig show is over doesn’t mean they can’t steal the spotlight. Pregaming the Bloomers show too aggressively, a Mask and Wig freshman found he needed to puke. The freshman ran out of the show and into the bustling men’s room. Unable to locate an empty toilet, the boy unceremoniously yacked in an innocent bystanders urinal… and all over the guy’s dick and shoes. Talk about a State of Confucian.
