1. That kid who stinks up the classroom with his McDonald’s bacon–egg–and–cheese every Tuesday and Thursday.
2. The pregnant Copa hostess that never remembers who came through the door first.
3. The only bouncer at Smoke’s who asks for a legit second form of identification.
4. The kids who fall asleep in the VP carrels when you really need one.
5. Allegro’s, for having “whenever I feel like it” hours.
6. Your roommate who sleeps with the lights on.
7. Douchey trust–fund babies who set the market price of Fling floor passes at $800.
8. All the people on campus having more sex than you are.
9. Your Molly dealer who couldn’t deliver before Fling because he had a problem set due.
10. The Russian Lowbrow editor from Brooklyn.
