Street: You went to Riverdale High School. Do you consider yourself a Betty or a Veronica? Michael Roberts: Veronica, maybe? I just never liked Betty.
Street: I thought everyone liked Betty. She’s an All-American sweetheart. MR: And I never liked Archie. I’m not a ginger.
Street: My Penn Card looks like _______ MR: I was posing for a modeling commercial. It’s from graduation, and my advisor awkwardly told me I looked like an actor in it. Yeah, it’s a little up–close and personal.
Street: If you were in a class, where would you sit? MR: I always sit in the back, because I’m 6’2”, so sitting in the front, I either block people and they say things to me awkwardly, or the teacher looks at me all the time because I do like to talk a lot. So I’d rather sit in the back.
Street: So are you sitting in the back for the benefit of your classmates? MR: I do it for the benefit of the Penn students…you can hear the sarcasm in that, right?
Street: If you could create a class and teach it, what would it be? MR: Probably something that involves many, many different disciplines. I get distracted very easily, so I get involved in a lot of things at Penn.
Street: What would the Penn Course Review of that class be? MR: It’d be great. And I would write it.
Street: What’s your favorite word? MR: Cosmopolitan? It’s worldly, it’s pretentious. People don’t really know what it means so they have to look it up after you talk to them.
Street: What’s your New Year’s Resolution? MR: To try wakeboarding, or windsurfing.
Street: I broke my nose wakeboarding. MR: Really? I’ve actually had a nose job.
Street: Wait, tell us more! MR: It was the week before I got into Penn. I was playing basketball and I wasn’t really paying attention. One of my friends who was guarding me like, swung his elbow and knocked my nose off. I went to the plastic surgeon, and they had to fix it to be normal.
Street: Did you change the shape of your nose? MR: Before it was better, I could tell you that. Now it’s not that great.
Street: You’re stuck on a desert island and all you have is a physical, gigantic copy of the Penn Course Review. What do you do with it, and how will it help you survive? MR: Well, first of all, I can’t put it in the water, because it would probably drown. I’d probably do a lot of reading. And I wouldn’t be taking classes because I wouldn’t be getting off the freakin’ island.
Street: If you could star in one of Julia Roberts’ movies-- MR: Notting Hill. Hands down. I just think Hugh Grant there is awesome. He owned an antique bookstore and picked up an international movie star. You can’t get more cosmopolitan than that.
Street: Clever, sir. MR: Am I winning now?
Street: Yes. You won this interview.
