This past Saturday saw the discovery of a drug lab in a freshman dorm at Georgetown. The whole story had “perfect scandal” written all over it: college kids at an elite school, making their own drugs from the comfort of their Twin XL–equipped room!
What more do you need to fire up some good, old–fashioned media outrage? It felt like every stereotype about college and drugs was coming true, unfolding before our very eyes in the national spotlight! In fact, the whole thing could have been taken directly from the stupidest, schlockiest, most overblown member of the college fantasy genre — The Rules of Attraction.
The kids at Georgetown may have had their own drug production operation going on, but the debauched morons of Camden College can put them away like nobody’s business. I vote that someone put them in touch with one another, because if they joined forces they’d probably throw one hell of an End of the World party.
Even though the Georgetown operation didn’t turn out to be a meth lab as had been reported earlier, the story would have been perfectly at home in the hellish, dunce–filled parallel universe of Camden College. We can rest assured that, while we’re buckling down in the library, at least someone out there is finding a way to make college as scandalous as it’s often portrayed onscreen.
