n anticipation of the September 25 release of I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, the film adaptation of his best-selling book of the same name, Tucker Max is premiering his movie across the country on a month-long promotional tour. Street hopped aboard the tour bus and sat down with the legendary king of debauchery to discuss politics, the changing face of literature, the author’s early years and of course, sex.
Street: Long before you started chronicling your drunken sexcapades on your website, you went to a boarding school in NJ called Blair Academy. Did you give them a lot of trouble? Tucker Max: I was always, always on double-secret probation. A kid’s hair away from being thrown out. I hated it when I was there, but after I left I felt like it was probably a really good place for me. It was probably the last place in my life where anyone actually cared about me and treated me fairly. Because the world doesn’t care, and the world doesn’t treat you fairly. Even people who didn’t like me were always fair. When I went to Blair, it was just making that transition from third tier to second tier. I was one of those kids who was really smart, but who Lawrenceville and Peddie didn’t want. When I got in, I had the highest SAT score they’d ever had. I had an 800 on the verbal; you can’t break a perfect score. But we had conduct grades. E was excellent, G was good, S was satisfactory and U was unsatisfactory. Supposedly it was impossible to get a 4.0 U. I had like seven of them. I was such a prick but so much smarter than everyone else.
Street: You have pretty strong convictions. How do you think you came to be this way? TM: How do dogs get hairy? They’re born that way, I guess. I am who I am. I wish there were a secret to confidence and success. Believe me, I would’ve written that book instead of I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell. It would have sold a lot more.
Street: A lot of people accredit you with creating the male equivalent of chick-lit. TM: Fratire, right. If the New York Times wants to say that I invented a new literary genre, then I will accept that.
Street: “I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell” is a collection of stories. How did you create a single coherent narrative, and how did you decide what to include in the movie? TM: We knew that we wanted to start with the Embassy Suites story [the Austin Road Trip story]. The shit scene, we knew that was cinematic and could be an iconic scene that anchors a movie and everyone talks about.
Street: Did you have any problems with the actors while working on the set? TM: [...] Honestly the hardest person to work with on the movie was probably me. I had so much of my identity wrapped up in getting this right, and I just didn’t know how to collaborate, because everything in my life I had always done on my own. It was hard for me to learn how to work with other people. I learned a lot.
Street: There’s always a question of nature versus nurture. Do you think your upbringing had an effect on who you are today? TM: I didn’t have very good parents. They didn’t put broomsticks up my butt, but they just weren’t good parents. Dad’s on marriage #4, Mom’s on marriage #3. They were kind of neglectful. As a kid, you either become a broken whore or you rely on yourself for everything and you become ridiculously independent. Then when you succeed you’re like, “Fuck it, I don’t need these people.” You have an overconfidence that comes out of necessity.
Street: You’ve fucked a midget. What’s the next challenge? TM: It’s not like I go out and say, “Okay, now I have to have sex with… like… a dead girl or something.” (Laughter). Listen, if she dies mid-coitus I feel like you’re allowed to finish, right? Now it’s just whatever comes along. The other night there was a girl in Raleigh who was an x-ray tech. I was like, can we fuck on x-ray? Can we get a picture of it? She was like, I’ll do you one better, we’ll get it on video. Now I’ve invented skeleton porn.
Street: What would you consider your most monumental sexual experience? TM: In terms of, like, outlandish/amazing? It’s hard to top sex-ray. I mean, it just happened, so it’s fresh in my memory. That and the midget.
Street: Favorite sexual position? TM: It depends on the girl. But normally I like to be on top. I like being in a position of dominance. Why? Are you single?
