AP Florida — The AIDS virus is spreading at an alarming rate in elderly resort communities in Delray Beach, sources say. The citizens are maintaining their active lifestyle and infecting one another at a rampant pace.
“The way the disease is transferred is simple,” says geriatric epidemiologist Esther Horowitz, herself old and infected. “The men around here take Viagra like it’s herring. Their wives become uninterested, you know, with the whole menopause thing. TProxy-Connection: keep-alive Cache-Control: max-age=0
men drive down to Miami and, you know, get it on. Prostitutes. They contract all sorts of things and then give it back to their wives, their companions. Sometimes they share their insulin needles! It’s an epidemic.” One of the afflicted, Gerald K., who chooses to remain anonymous, says, “It’s not a problem for me. I got Medicare. They’ll cover anything! As long as I don’t break my hip, I feel great!”
Citizens of Delray Beach need to be wary of the dangers of multiple sex partners and should consider using condoms. Sunset Coral Century Vista Gardens North activities director Sharon Klein says, “We are trying to divert their attention with more aquafitness classes and bridge games. The shuffle board pucks will become mobile testing units next week.”
