Visiting Curator Exhibition Creative Artists Network
237 S. 18th St., Suite 3A
(215)546-7775
Want to see artwork from an artist you probably never heard of? Go to the Creative Artists Network. They pick Philadelphia area artists who are just beginning to show their work and are not represented by a gallery. So if you are an artist looking for someplace to show your work, check this place out. They can get you started and on your way.
Non-Retinal: Kovert Konflagration Kovenant
Slought Foundation
4017 Walnut Street
Wed-Sat, 11a.m.-6p.m., through Jan. 31., free
(215)222-9050
www.slought.org
Artwork by David Stephens, a blind African-American sculptor, is currently on display at the Slought Foundation. His latest works incorporate Braille and sculpted crosses and are in response to the 2002 Supreme Court decision for Virginia vs. Black, which declared the Klu Klux Klan intimidation tactic of cross burning a form of free speech. These conceptual and challenging pieces are intended to promote discussion of this shocking verdict.
New Paintings: Buchi Upjohn Aghaji
ArtJaz Gallery
53 N. 2nd St.
Wed - Sun, through Dec. 4, 11 a.m. - 5 p.m., free
(215)922-4800
www.artjaz.com
"Art is only as good as the feelings it produces within us," Buchi Upjohn Aghaji's says. A native of Nigeria, he depicts rich folk images in his art. His work includes, but is not limited to, the medias of oil, watercolor and acrylic on cold-pressed paper, canvas, burlap, wood and pottery. This exhibit features his brilliant new paintings, all with huge, incandescent brush strokes. His distinct use of color-tones is both memorable and familiar.
Reception for Joseph Wentland
Highwire Gallery
1315 Cherry Street
Fri, 6 p.m. -- 9 p.m., free
(215) 829-1255
Joseph Wentland's paintings look like the weird bacteria that you would look at under a microscope in biology class. Or, it kind of looks at those bizarre pictures that people stare at for hours and hours in order to see some "totally awesome 3-D monkey" or whatever treasure the dots hold. Or, that flower with an eight foot diameter that smells really awful and can only be found in the deep jungles of the Amazon. Yea, one of those.
Reception for Nancy Agati, Lisa Dahl, and William Steiger
Pentimenti Gallery
145 N. 2nd St.
Fri, 6 p.m.-8 p.m., free
(215) 625-9990
www.pentimenti.com
My personal favorite of these artists is Nancy Agati's looming, cosmic landscapes. If you aren't down with the whole art scene or just astronomy in general, you should go to these receptions to score some free food. One of my friends went down to the heart of Old City and ate all the shrimp his belly could handle -- and that certainly is a lot of shrimp, my friend. Fried shrimp, sauteed shrimp, jumbo shrimp, coconut shrimp, teriyaki shrimp.
Reception for Small Works Exhibit
Artists' House Gallery
57 N. 2nd St.
Fri, 5 p.m.-8p.m., free
(215) 923-8440
I am pretty sure this exhibition features only paintings that are less than 1 in. by 1 in., thereby making them "tiny." I went on one of those teen tours in middle school, and I met this girl whose nickname happened to be "Tiny." Not only was this girl literally "tiny," but she had bizarre eating habits. The girl's diet consisted solely of Chex Mix. After inhaling all that artery-clogging cereal, I doubt the girl is so tiny nowadays.
Sedgwick Fine Craft Show
Sedgwick Cultural Center
7137 Germantown Avenue
Fridays, 6 p.m. - 9p.m., Saturdays- Sundays, 1 p.m. - 5 p.m., through Dec. 23
(215)248-9229
www.sedgwickcenter.org
Because I'm too cheap to make purchases, I like to make things. For example, I made this kickin' dress out of my grandmother's old curtains. I want you kids to know that I happen to get a lot of ass with that shapeless green and purple paisley print dress. There's nothing more of a turn on for guys if you go up to them looking like a couch and saying, "Hey baby, you wanna sit on me?" At least I can pass that dress as art and say that the structured lines and chaotic print represents my feelings toward mass media today. Oh yeah, the people at the Sedgwick Cultural Center will eat that shit up right up as if it were Aunt Jemima's cookies.
William Steiger: Indication
Pentimenti Gallery
145 N. 2nd St.
Thursdays -- Saturdays, 12 p.m. -- 5:30 p.m., Sundays, 12 p.m. -- 5:00 p.m., free
(215)625-9990
www.pentimenti.com
From looking at his work, it appears that William Steiger is obsessed with images of bucolic, agrarian life. And yet there is something very modern, even city-like about his work. The lines are perfectly uniform. The color-tones are solid, non-breaking. Which leads me to one conclusion -- this man has a fetish for gals in pigtails and overalls. And who can blame him? Farm girls are amazing.
Better than Ezra and Pat McGee Band
Trocadero
10th and Arch streets
Wed, 8 p.m., $25
(215) 922-LIVE
www.thetroc.com
Better than Ezra takes me back. Oh, yes, all the way back to the glory days of middle school when I was the queen bee, the hottie on campus, the main enchilada. Whatever you want to call it, I was "it" and I knew it. Then I came to Penn. After being rejected by nearly every sorority to only find myself crawling to the DP for redemption, I started to get the picture. The peak of my life had passed and now I slave away every night here only to go home to bag of Doritos and box of Oreos.
Godsmack
Kirby Center
71 Public Square
Tue, 8 p.m., $35
(570) 826-110
www.kirbycenter.org
I never quite understood how Godsmack got its name. Was the band trying to encourage people to physically smack God? Or did they think that Gods are mack? This is the question. In spite of all that confusion, Godsmack has managed to churn out a couple of hits only to find themselves playing in some hick town. They should follow the footsteps of great bands like Creed and Nickelback and just retire already. Jesus!
Noa
Annenberg Center
3680 Walnut Street
Tue, 7:30 p.m.-10 p.m., $21-$43
(215) 898-5000
www.upenn.edu/artsandculture
Although Noa is a Hawaiian name, this lady is actually Jewish. Yep, she is a Jewish chanteuse who sings a mixture of jazz, folk and Middle Eastern rhythm. Ha, sounds like a perfect hook up for Jon Levin, one of my fellow Guides' editors. He happens to be quite Jewish and is very knowledgeable in the world of music (especially jazz).So all you non-miskayt ladies of Hillel, call Jon at (215) 555-2839 so you can croon throaty music to his jazz guitar.
Philadelphia Orchestra: Pain and Healing
Tue, 8 p.m., $10-$110
Kimmel Center for Performing Arts
260 S. Broad St. # 901
(215)790-5800
www.kimmelcenter.org
So apparently the Philadelphia Orchestra's performance is not only comprised of the orchestra itself but also singers. So now you get a two for one deal where you can see the orchestra and the Philadelphia Chorale Singers all in one show. It's a whole event that captures the horror of the Nazi rule through music. They sing one song dedicated to the destruction of the Warsaw Ghetto and then another as a consoling piece. Just think of Nazi terror in opera style, all from the comfort of your own Kimmel seat.
The Pixies
Tweeter Center
1 Harbour Blvd.
Sat, 8 p.m., $35
(856) 365-1300
www.tweetercenter.com/philadelphia
The Pixies, one band that indie rockers across the world have come to obsess over. They have sold millions of records and their tours always sell out. However, I will take this time to admit that usually I would label myself as an indie rocker but for some reason I can't stand this band at all. Maybe I am still naive and ignorant, but part of me just says that they are overrated. "Where is My Mind?" is a good song, though.
Vinicius CantuØria Quartet
The Sedgwick Cultural Center
7137 Germantown Ave.
Sat, 8 p.m., $18 in advance, $22 at the door
(215)248-9229
www.sedgwickcenter.org.
I may not know much about the economy of South American countries, but Brazil must be the biggest exporter of hot stuff since the Colombian drug cartel. Half a dozen Victoria's Secret models, several sensuous coffee blends and one dangerous bikini wax. Get a taste of Brazil's original exotic treat, the bossa nova beat, in an evening with Vinicius Canuaria and steamy samba classics like "The Girl from Ipanema." Tall and tan and young and lovely, the girl from Ipanema goes walking. Oh man, that line makes me think of Adriana Lima. Hott.
Y100 Festival
Tweeter Center
Thu, 6 p.m., $39.50
(856) 365-1300
www.tweetercenter.com
This 'rockin' festival has headliners like Jimmy Eat World, Good Charlotte, Hives and Silvertide. Honestly, I think Jimmy Eat World is one of the most underrated bands out there. I mean, "Bleed American," how great is that song? In fact, many magazines list them as the prototype for all emo bands. Although I'm not sure if that is exactly a good thing, but Jimmy Eat World still knows how to work the ol' guit-box.
Phi Sigma Sigma
Holiday Raffle
37th and Locust (the compass)
Fri, 3 p.m., $2
I asked my roommate, a Phi Sig sister, to tell me about their Holiday Raffle fundraiser. "Students can purchase tickets on Locust Walk this week for a drawing to be held at the Compass on December 3rd. The price per ticket is just $2, and each one gives you a chance to win a gift certificate to one of nine restaurants or the grand prize, a $500 holiday shopping spree at the King of Prussia mall," she carefully explained. Her eyebrows arched in an expression of certainty, and her voice intoned logic and reason. "Who wouldn't want that?" Damn, I've never heard a sorority chick make so much sense.
The Clean House
Wilma Theater
265 S. Broad St.
Tue-Sun, various times, through Jan. 9, $30-$48
(215)546-7824
This play has been described as "a comedic account of a home in disarray." Well, I don't know about you, but I find that hard to believe. I mean, how is it possible for a wife who discovers her cheating husband to say, "Oh damn, that was funny honey ... why don't you cheat again for comedy's sake?" The only kind of laughing I can see resulting from a cheating spouse is the half-crazy-sardonic kind that's often coupled with, "I'm a fucking idiot. That gun is looking mighty appealing -- more so than your wandering dick, dear."
Gift of Giving
Shubin Theatre
407 Bainbridge Street
Thursdays-Wednesdays, through Dec 12, 2:30 p.m., 7 p.m., 8 p.m., $10-$20
(215) 592-0119
www.greenlightplays.com
A relationship drama is fused with the short stories of O. Henry in this Armen Pandola play. The male character, a writer named Jim, has taken to schmoozing with his babalicious literary agent -- "isn't that always the way with these author-types!" -- while his wife, Suzanne, is out earning money to support his ungrateful ass. Amidst the drama, writer Armen Pandola intermixes renditions of O. Henry's classic stories. Ay, there's the rub.
Santaland Diaries
Society Hill Playhouse
507 S. 8th St.
Preview Performance Thu, 8 p.m., Regular performances Fridays - Mondays, through Dec. 18, 8 p.m., 2:30 p.m. on Mondays, $10-$18
(215)923-4800
Based on David Sedaris' hilarious prose, the Santaland Diaries will reorient your thoughts on Santa Claus, elves and the entire holiday season. A young writer goes to work at Macy's as an elf, and he finds it tortuous. Obnoxious shit kids. Elf training. Who wouldn't crack under the pressure? Before you set your kid on Santa's lap, see this play. Perhaps Santa's not so innocent after all.
The Walkmen
Theater of Living Arts
334 South Street
Fri, 9 p.m., $12
(215) 922-1011
www.theateroflivingarts.net
The Walkmen make me bleed. I don't quite understand how they do it, but somehow they are able to fuse rock with organs and Christmas cheer. Yes, I said it, if you want to get into the holiday spirit this year, you should jet over to see this band. While they are rocking out on stage, you can be sitting back drinking egg nog, sporting the hideous reindeer sweater that your grandmother sewed just for you. Regardless, The Walkmen know how to walk the right way and make me weak in the knees.
Where's My Money
Walnut Street Theatre,Studio 5
825 Walnut Street
Wed-Sat, through Dec. 12, 8 p.m., Sun, 3 p.m., $15 for students
(215)574-3550
www.wstonline.org
Imagine your ex-lover rising from the grave to collect money you owed them out of revenge or lust. Then having to tell your spouse. Who's going to look crazy now? Ghosts, sex, money and marriage all in one play, what more could you ask for? I'll tell you what; it's a comedy (big surprise). Add on top of that, you pay what you can for your ticket on all Wednesday showings! Sweet!
Libations: Wine and Tea in East Asia
Philadelphia Museum of Art
Benjamin Franklin Parkway and 26th Street
Tues-Sun, 10 a.m.-5 p.m., Fri,10 a.m.-8:45 p.m., through May, $7
(215) 763-8100
www.philamuseum.org
I believe that I am a certified banana (a.k.a. a white-washed Asian-American). I am not really proud of this, especially when situations arise that highlight this fact about myself. For example, whenever my parents and I go to a Korean restaurant, there is always a 15 minute argument between us when they order tea before dinner. "Drink some tea." "No, I don't like tea." "Why not? All Koreans like tea." "Well I don't." "You gonna marry white boy aren't you?!" etc. Well, just to spite them, I'm going to go to this exhibit at the PMA and become a fucking tea connoisseur. Then I'll start going to Asian parties and pick up a nice Korean boy whose last name is Kim. Ha!
