HighbrowFebruary 6, 2013 at 2:32 pm

Ask Miss Cassandra: Of Orientation and  De–flowerization

I think I might be gay.

First off that is not a question, which is especially ironic for someone who is questioning their sexuality. Secondly, you might be gay. And that’s totally okay. You probably realized that a sex columnist with a drag queen name would be pretty LGBTQ friendly. That being said there are a lot of reasons to be okay with experimenting with your sexuality, especially on Penn’s campus. Let me break it down for you:

1.     The Huffington Post says that Penn is the 5th most LGBTQ friendly school in America this year… See we love you!

2.     Have you seen the gay guys at Penn?  Seriously, they are gorgeous. They make me want to be “Mr. Cassandra.” (Really, but have you seen them?)

An oldy but a goody

3.     Philadelphia has a Gayborhood and that Gayborhood has the best-frozen yogurt.

4.     As cheesy as this sounds, it’s college. It really is a time to find out who you are and what you like. You know yourself best so just do what feels right, whether that means you are ready to explore your sexuality more or not.

I hope you can find yourself, and when you end up figuring it out, whether you’re gay or not or somewhere in between, call me. Let’s get drunk.

Should I lose my virginity to a random hookup?

Glad to see you’re broadening your sexual horizons, my little lamb. That’s what college is for. And I’m happy that you’ve come to Auntie Cassandra for some guidance, because I’m about to serve it to you straight–up:

Should you lose your virginity to a random hookup? I think the appropriate answer is no. Even though it seems trite and very young–adult–romance–novel–esque, there is some merit to holding out for someone special. Losing your virginity is something you can only do once —YOLYVO, as those college–aged hooligans would say. It’s a meaningful—some might even say monumental—experience. So why wouldn’t you want to do it with someone who cares about you?

Could be this guy.

On the other hand, a random hookup is sometimes the best kind of ATM for cashing in your v-card. Holding out for The One could mean keeping your legs closed for years, and for some people that’s just too long. If you’re in the moment and your body is urging you to go for it, then listen to it. It may not be as sensual and special as it would with a partner you know, but then again, the first time never really is. With your chastity belt unfastened, you will be able to experience your next sexual escapade with that significant other in full capacity.

What it all comes down to is what YOU want out of the experience. For many, first-time sex is a big deal. For others, it’s just something to get out of the way. The choice is yours and yours alone. Don’t let any sex-crazed Quakers (how’s that for an oxymoron?) persuade you otherwise. Just remember two things: always use protection and put on The xx. You’ll thank me later.


Want to ask Miss Cassandra one of the questions burning in your deepest loins? Then check out the 34st.com homepage and look for the “Ask” box in the upper left hand corner! Or send any questions via e-mail to highbrow@34st.com.

One Person has left comments on this post

By Get wet. on February 6, 2013 at 2:32 pm

You should lose your virginity to a hook-up… probably. Somebody that you don’t necessarily care about, but you trust is safe. Also somebody very soon. Sex can be awesome, but the first time it’s not. You just need to get your feet (and panties) wet. The faster you do that, the faster you’ll get to the super duper awesome sex you’ll start having once you’ve done it a few hundred times.

Besides, the concept of virginity is stupid. Don’t glamorize an outmoded patriarchal attempt at policing your body.

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