HighbrowFebruary 9, 2012 at 5:54 am

The Roundup: 2.9.2012

Valentine’s Day is almost upon us, and campus is abuzz with heart–shaped preparations. Ugh. If you’re single as hell like Highbrow, don’t fret. We hear gossip mends a broken heart.

Love is in the air! And in the men’s room, apparently. One of the bathrooms on the second floor of Stiteler Hall has been deemed “one of the best anonymous gay hookup spots” on campus. Even the walls of this bathroom are covered with the names of various porn websites and phone numbers of seniors trying to hook up. Got no plans for V–Day? You know where to go…

AEPi’s annual scavenger hunt this year was filled with dramaaaa. A source tells us that one of the items on the list was to flirt with a Wawa employee. Not a bad idea — it can get pretty lonely behind that sandwich counter. But the task went awry when the boys took it too far and a cop stepped in. Lucky for them, hitting on Wawa clerks isn’t a criminal offense. No arrests were made.

We hear the AEPi boys rose to another pledging challenge — the cinnamon challenge, that is. If you don’t know what that is, it involves swallowing a spoonful of cinnamon and inevitably choking on it. YouTube it and prepare to spend a few hours literally ROFLing. Instead of the recommended dosage of a teaspoon, we’re told the poor boys were given Solo cups instead. That’s gotta hurt.

Our name’s Johnny Knoxville and you’re watching Oz make fools of themselves. We hear the Oz annual pledge–run Super Bowl party for their brothers this past Sunday was a big success. They even included a Jackass–themed halftime show to entertain the crowd. Sources tell us it was, like, the best Super Bowl party ever. OMG!

Seniors, juniors and the occasional blessed underclassmen weren’t the only ones getting wasted at Smoke’s this past week. We hear Kweder was trashed during his weekly Tuesday set. By trashed, we mean even drunker than usual. Dude was even on the floor at one point. That shit cray.

 
2 People have left comments on this post


By Maybell Jones on February 9, 2012 at 5:54 am

This isnt funny anymore. You’re writers suck. Get an entirely new staff and start from square 1.

By Aaron on February 9, 2012 at 5:54 am

^Your*

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