Dude: AP Chem was my favorite. I hit on my teacher all the time.
Guy at Vag Mons: I think the Silly Bandz are Nuva Rings.
Football Bro: But I’m not mentally strong, you know? Mentally I bench like 20.
Guy in Rodin: Guess who got an anonymous cookie–gram?!
Girl 1: I’m three seconds away from throwing up.
Girl 2: Omg. I’m so jealous.
Preppy guy: If I was going to stick anything up my butthole, it’d be my own finger.