EgoNovember 17, 2011 at 7:01 am

Ego of the Week: The Big Men On Campus

No lack of self–esteem here! The boys of AXO's annual Big Man On Campus philanthropy event basically talk about their penises and other concerns.

Adrian Franco

Street: What makes a true BMOC?
Sam Schear: BMOC’s a state of mind. It’s a lifestyle.
Sam Berger: A lot of weight fluctuations.
Kevin Kennedy: None of which are healthy.
SS: Lettuce by day, celery by night.
Neil Dubey: Hard–working. Alpha male. Jackhammer. Merciless. Insatiable.
Jake Levin: It’s not about the size of the boat, but the motion of the ocean.
Nick Henderson: Pelvic thrusting.

Street: What are you afraid of?
JL: I’m afraid of spending one more day as a C–List celebrity on campus. I’m also afraid of those days when I forget to use deodorant. Then I smell like the ball pit at a McDonald’s play place.
ND: Sam Schear’s chest.
SS: Balding. Measurements of any kind.

Street: Why are you going to win?
ND: Two words: Bolly. Wood.
JL: I called Miss Cleo and she felt in her soul that I would… need to pay another $9.99 to find out.
Peter Hobson: Am I going to win?
SS: Bad lighting and a sympathetic crowd… and I’m in Theos!


Street: How did you prepare for the competition?
ND: Copious amounts of Adderall and cocaine.
NH: Slimfast. A lot of Slimfast for me.
SB: Looking at myself in the mirror and not liking what I see.
John Hurley: I hate it. But I love it.

Street: What’s your secret weapon in the competition?
JH: Semen.
SB: Semen, then feathers. For the group dance.
ND: Not stuffing my crotch.
Derek Vigoa: Emergency waxing sesh.
SS: Experience in women’s clothing. Jewish Guilt. Oh, and socks, a lot of socks.
JL: Nice try, but my secret weapon will be released on November 16th.

Street: Who’s the best dancer?
Alex Friedlander: Schear gives great lap dances, it’s unbeatable.

Street: What’s your latest discovery?
SS: That there’s a tanning salon on Drexel’s campus you can go to without being caught.
JL: Saying you’re the biggest man on campus can be interpreted in really awesome ways. Thanks, AXO.
PH: Apparently Cs can still get degrees at this school… and I get Cs.
Peter Amos: My feminine side.

Street: What’s the best kept secret at Penn?
SS: I’ll go ahead and say the dental library.
JL: If you wear a suit to class, you can leave early. Just say you have an interview.

Street: If you win the title, how will it affect your life?
ND: I’m going to make tons of sex videos and have them leaked.
SB: A few people will like me more, but most people will just resent me.

Street: Who’s the front runner right now?
PA: I’ll take that one.

Street: Who’s going to lose?
JL: Can we say the audience?

One Person has left comments on this post

By on November 17, 2011 at 7:01 am

This is a great interview, thanks very much for posting it.

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