HighbrowOctober 27, 2011 at 6:40 am

Toasts and Roasts 10/27

TOASTS
Highbrow hates people who break the law, but we love it when they get what they deserve. Toasts to the swift hand of justice.

Hey, ho, klepto! We hear a sophomore girl got caught this week for stealing massive amounts of stuff from her off–campus housemates. From bracelets to purses to clothes, this chick has been hoarding expensive designer items she took from friends since last year, but she finally got caught and was forced to pack up and move out. Peace out, crazy.

We’ll see your stealing and raise you breaking and entering. Two liquored–up St. A’s guys snuck into an SDT junior’s house this past weekend and helped themselves to a late night snack from her kitchen. They chose tomatoes and milk of all things. Ew. But props to the tiny blonde who wasted no time in kicking them down the stairs.

ROASTS
With Halloween this weekend, the bar is raised pretty high for what’s considered fun. A big thumbs down to the parties that sound super sucky.

Zete and Sigma Chi both had 1% parties this past weekend. Get it? It’s funny because Zete is the one percent but they dressed up like the 99! Totally got us. One Sig Chi brother sporting a suit and a Wall Street douche attitude even got punched in the face by a Philly local after he was denied entry. So, have you all gotten this theme out of your systems now? The sooner the better.

In other bizarre theme party news, one Chi O social chair emailed the other sorority social chairs asking if anyone knew of a local barn for their next date party. Yeehaw. Howdy. Insert cow joke here. Moo.

Oh, and ZBT’s having a “Rave in a Grave?” No comment. But a general PSA to all frats: your party name doesn’t have to rhyme. Seriously.

More in Highbrow:
Word on the Street: Keep the Candy
My Penn Addiction: Penn Directory
Overheard at Penn

 
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