HighbrowMarch 17, 2011 at 2:21 am

The Gutter: 03.17.2011

Unfortunately for us, most of you seemed to have behaved yourselves over Spring Break. Whether in New Orleans or Punta Cana or on your couch, good, clean fun was the name of the game. Well, just for most of you.

Penn invaded Punta Cana in a big way. One Tridelt was lucky that some of her sisters had her back when she was evidently found completely incoherent and covered in vomit in a compromising position with the club security guard. A trip to the hospital ensued, but not before she and her rescuers were kicked out of a cab due to her altered state. Who knew you had to pay for a Dominican hospital bill up front?

Elsewhere on the island, a Theta girl was apparently engaged in a menage a trois with a Theos brother and another suitor in her hotel room hot tub when her horrified roommates walked in. The Theos brother, seemingly upset at the interruption, proceeded to hurl a bottle of red wine at the girls, which instead smashed against a wall. Yet another hospital trip capped off the evening, as one of the guys required stitches after injuring himself on the broken glass.

AEPi brothers received an unwelcome surprise in their inboxes last Friday when an Executive Director from nationals dropped a rage–filled email announcing an immediate suspension because of damages to the chapter house. Just hours later, another email arrived, not only lifting the five–hour suspension, but also apologizing for that morning’s blowup and outlining a more appropriate response to the damage. Nothing like a little suspension to welcome you back from Spring Break!


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